FIVE STEPS TO DE-ESCALATE AN IRATE CALLER
From listening to following through, it’s
possible to diffuse most situations with the proper action
Most angry callers are angry because they feel like their voice isn’t being heard.
By Michael Wayne
More than 3,800 years ago, a Babylonian named Nanni took the time to write a complaint letter. Nanni used a clay tablet and inscribed his disappointment in a shipment of copper ingots that was below the expected grade. Nearly 300 words when translated to English, Nanni’s frustration with Ea-nasir, the seller, is boiling over. Nanni closes his cuneiform lashing as follows:
Take cognizance that (from now on) I will not accept here any copper from you that is not of fine quality. I shall (from now on) select and take the ingots individually in my own yard, and I shall exercise against you my right of rejection because you have treated me with contempt.
For those who are interested, Nanni’s full complaint can be found online easily. The actual tablet resides in the British Museum.
In our world of insurance, irate clients are common. More times than not, account managers are the ones who become entangled in such encounters. They are typically the ones who pick up the phone to speak to the Nanni on the other end of the line.
Account managers are, unquestionably, special. They are in the role that they are in, usually because they possess the ability to calm the waters around them. Just in case they, or you, need a bit of coaching, here are the five steps to de-escalate an irate caller.
Listen, listen, and then listen some more. Most angry callers are angry because they feel like their voice isn’t being heard. Consequently, you need to be the ear that lets them get their initial flood of emotions out. Usually, their gripe isn’t about you. So, don’t make it about you by reacting. Don’t interrupt them. Let them speak their mind and, when they’ve finished, you can begin the process of providing a definitive course of action to get to a solution.
If the caller simply cannot get their anger under control to let you help, you may have to tactfully tell them you will call them back at a designated time to continue the conversation after you have done some research regarding the situation.
In reality, you are giving them some time to, hopefully, cool off.
Let them know that you have heard them. Hidden away in the barrage you are experiencing will likely be vital information. Once you have a clear opportunity to do so, ask the caller if they are okay with you presenting to them what you have heard to ensure you have the facts correct and the information you need to help tackle their problem.
This is not the time for you to make an empty promise that you are going to “fix everything” for them. In reality, you may not be able to make good on an empty promise. This is your moment to empathize. Going beyond that and failing could make the caller see you as just another broken cog in the machinery of their dilemma.
Define your action items. Your plan of attack will likely necessitate speaking to someone else besides the caller. Assure the caller that you have your tasks outlined to assist them. Find out when they are available later in the day to speak again so that you can provide an update about your progress, which will hopefully include definitive options for them to consider.
The fact that the caller knows you are legitimately working for them should be another trigger to bring down their anger level.
Call them back. Aside from yelling at you on the phone, the caller who initially rang your line largely feels powerless. When you call back and offer options, you are actually providing them with some power.
This is your chance to dazzle them with an answer that will immediately have them smiling or, at the very least, remove the bullseye from you because they know that you are on their side and their teammate fighting through this calamity.
Follow through. If you want to lose the caller’s business, it’s simple. Don’t offer options. Even worse, offer options but then fail to serve the caller’s needs by not doing the work you said you would. Exceeding the caller’s expectations is critical. They must see you as someone they can trust moving forward. If you break that trust, if you lose their faith and confidence, they will find someone else to bring their business who is waiting with options.
More than anything else, remember that the caller is someone whose business you likely fought hard to obtain. Think about how you would react if you were going through what they are. More than likely, you can find some situation from your life that lines up with their experience.
Use that as the fuel you need to do your job.
The author
Michael Wayne is a freelance insurance writer.
